In the past two weeks I have had six, yes six, conversations about terrible bosses and my heart is so broken. There is manager trash out there and we know it. But it got me thinking,
Are we in an epidemic of garbage leadership?
There have always been bad leaders but it feels like it’s getting worse. Is there some sort of post-COVID, dumpster fire of leadership happening?
I have no data to support this but what I'm learning is that we have all experienced garbage leadership. We have all had bad bosses. We've all probably had at least one truly terrible boss that we don't want to remember…and maybe some of us are in therapy as a result. But this isn’t a rant about terrible leadership.
Everyone has had a bad boss and there are lots of reasons for this: unjustified promotions, people manipulating their way up the proverbial career ladder, etc.
Everyone has had a bad boss. And no one has ever been one.
I’m confident no one is reading this thinking, “I was manipulative. I let my ego get in the way. I was unqualified to lead people.”
Have you heard about the study where they polled people and asked them about their driving skills? Nearly everyone in the study claims that their driving skills are better than everyone else's, which is statistically impossible and also very funny.
Is this what's happening with leadership? It seems likely that if we ARE a terrible boss, we may never know it. Even with feedback from employees or co-workers, our minds are very good at discounting criticism.
So I have a challenge for all of us.
Let's assume we are all bad leaders. Let's assume if you are in a role where people report to you, that you're just not a very good manager. Let’s work to correct it and work to learn more.
Books and videos are great, but I’m talking about more intentional activities where you can obtain objective feedback and learn new skills:
Sign up for a management course or program.
Join a mentorship program (ICology plug!)
Hire a coach.
Start going to therapy.
Look, I'm not saying that we’re all manipulative jerks. What I am saying is we all need formal training on how to be better managers and better leaders. Let's take this assumption and instead of beating ourselves up, let’s learn and grow and be the most healthy, supportive, emotionally intelligent leaders that we can be.
Cheers to the bad bosses. May we never be them again.
~ Kristin